the last 12 hours and the next 3 days

Our precious Louie went to bed with a slight fever last night. He woke up four times in between 7pm and 7am and I checked on him around four times more. Bear has been in Colorado with a great group of college-age MKs on a retreat or we would normally have shared getting up with the kids last night.

Around the 6th time up, I evidently wasn't completely awake. I gave Louie a bottle of just water (instead of formula) and put diaper rash creme on my hand instead of his bottom. Louie smiled and waited patiently while I washed my hand and got him a new bottle.

Then our security alarm went off at 7:15am as Jona ventured downstairs before I turned the motion detector off. Poor buddy. It was our first false alarm and he was so afraid the police were going to show up at our doorstep. His concern subsided after Brinks called to check on the alarm AND after we all realized that today is his 1/2 birthday. Cake ahead...

After baths for us all, Jona was the first to get downstairs and from the kitchen he announced, "Mom, I made myself breakfast!" "Great," I said, "what is it?" He then came back upstairs showing me his "sandwich": a rice crispy treat (courtesy of Granny Angie) sandwiched between two flat Krumkake's (courtesy of Grandma Ruth).

This Sunday I'll be in MN speaking at Maranatha Church. On Monday I'll share in chapel at Northwestern and that afternoon I'll have the opportunity to spend time with Bethany Publishers (I just finished "Finding an Unseen God: Reflections of a former Atheist" for them. It should be out in 2009). I'll come home late Monday night into the arms of my family and settle in to write the rest of the next book (a devotional for MOPS).

If I come to your mind, I'd greatly appreciate your prayers, especially for the time at Northwestern. I absolutely LOVED being with their students a few years ago. The message on my heart is a bit thick and focuses on our theology of pain. This generation's potential is unquestioned. But I believe that their ability to manage pain may prove to be a great hindrance to them realizing that potential.

windows

As I watch my children grow I am often conscious that I'm witnessing the miraculous.

Every day I'm privileged to be near windows that open into my threesome's souls. Today I saw Jonathan exercising enormous self-control on his computer. I saw him immediately going to check on younger ones when he heard them cry. Today I saw dear Keona making gifts for her friends. I saw her giving treasured possessions away to say, "I love you." Today I saw Louie offering others food and closing his hands when he was tempted to throw something in frustration.

We are growing, aren't we.

And it's miraculous.

In Jesus, we do not remain the same. Steadily, slowly, and surely we increase in wisdom, self-control, love, virtue. It's miraculous really, that born into a fallen world we grow increasingly into the image of Christ.

Planted by living water...bearing fruit in season...

Glorious.

at the check-in counter

"How are you?!" the United agent beamed from the check-in station. We had met a week earlier when I was flying back home after the first Northern New England retreat. She has a beautiful smile and spirit and within a few minutes we had connected hearts and I had left her with an Anonymous book.

Now it was a week later and there she was again! We greeted each other and she told me how much she was enjoying the book and what it was meaning to her. Then noticing I didn't have any suitcases with me she asked, "What's up? Are you flying somewhere today?"

"Actually, when I flew back into Main on Thursday for the second retreat, my wallet fell out of my bag and it hasn't turned up yet. It had all my credit cards and my ID. I have no way of proving my identity so we came to the airport early to work it all out," I shared.

Imagine. A week ago this dear woman and I had met. She KNEW who I was and was the singular person checking people in when I returned WITHOUT any ID. Only God...

She checked me in Sunday afternoon without any problem and sent me on my way to security who eventually let me head home after Alia and I pulled out every business card, checkbook, magazine, order form...we could find with my name/picture on it. Today I went and secured a new driver's license.

But her words are still with me, "Who knows Alicia? Maybe someone kept that wallet intending to use it for fraud but checked out your website when they saw your name. Maybe they'll read your book like I did. Maybe it's just what they need too."

That's seeing through the eyes of faith. Thank you my new friend. Thank you.

Northern New England--second weekend

Alia and I are relaxing at Bevie Jo and Dennis Marquardt's home in Windham, Maine. Earlier today we concluded a wonderful retreat with the amazing women of Northern New England. Thank you all for coming with such hungry hearts! It was a joy to be with you. Special thanks to Bevie Jo, Darlene, Beth, Tammy, Danielle, and Master's Commission!

honor for the gift-giver

"Thank you for your message. It meant a lot to me. I gave $5 in the church offering for your ministry," the dear woman said.

I looked into her eyes. They had seen hard times. She spoke hesitantly and I knew she lived with painful memories of the past and possibly troubled times in the present.

And she had given to me. She had entrusted me with her earnings. She had deposited in this ministry, in this life, in this family.

I felt humbled--as though the widow's mite had been placed in my hand.

I felt responsible--very aware that I will be accountable before God for how I manage this woman's gift.

May God grant all who steward other's offerings sobriety in the reception of gifts, holy fear in the use of gifts, and sincere gratitude and honor for the gift-givers.

Northern New England and Louie's ouwies

Last night I returned from a wonderful time with the fun women of Northern New England. We walked through Jesus' hidden years together (from Anonymous) and I've already received several messages from dear souls sharing how God breathed hope and purpose into seemingly barren seasons of life. Thank you all for receiving Missi and me so warmly!

This morning, precious Louie greeted me with his usual "Maaa-mmm!" followed by a slobbery hug. Then around five times today so far, he has looked at me with his big caramel eyes and said, "Ouwiee" while touching his head or hand or foot or ear.

Louie's "ouwiee" means, "I need a kiss, please." Of course, I stop everything I'm doing to look him in the eyes and kiss him. Then, in a flash, he's off again to continue playing with a smile on his face.

It's hard to determine what prompts these moments. Louie cries when he's REALLY hurting, so I know it's not an emergency. But "ouwiee" receives my immediate attention just as a scream does. Why? He's asking for touch, for love, for a reminder that we are "we." My heart melts at his request.

So I think as soon as I finish this blog, I'm going to go upstairs and sit at my piano, turn my thoughts toward God and say, "ouwiee." I'm really okay. There's no crisis or emergency. I'd just like to feel His touch.

I think He's already waiting.

update on the kids

"How is your family?" Jodie asked, "we still pray for you." Two years ago I had the joy of being with Jodie in the northwest for her conference. Jonathan had been in the ER twice the week before and we were aching for our son. Before I began speaking, I shared our need with those attending the conference and they began to pray...and many haven't stopped.

So tonight I thought I'd say "thank-you" and give an update on our beautiful tribe.

Jonathan: The doctors' consensus on last year's crisis was a strep virus that caused an infection in his brain. Our nutritionist boosted Jona's magnesium and he has only had one eye migraine since. Thank God! Jona has settled into home school and loves it. We tried two coops this year but Jona began to show signs again of severe stress related to the peer interaction and his own social frustration. So we're loving being home together and being intentional about planning time for him to be with other children.

Keona: We're supposed to go back to the pediatric opthamologist next month to check Keona's eyes again and see if the exercises have strengthened her muscles. She is reading well above grade level so we're not sure if the exercises resolved the issue of if she is just so determined (or stubborn) that telling her there was a challenge only inspired her to try even harder. Keona has friends coming out of her ears and continues to be a compassionate, loving, precious princess.

Louie: Little one is definitely understanding more these days but his words are still well under the "minimum" zone. The doctors felt he was 6-9 months delayed linguistically when he was 19 months old and we're do for a recheck in the next month or two. He is so tender, perceptive, servant-hearted...and WOW can he kick a ball. My dear friends tease me about his hair: I still haven't cut it so his locks are a wee bit long. It's the first hair cut drama--it means he isn't a baby anymore and I'm just not ready for that yet. I'll cut it soon...at least before he turns 5 :-)

I can not tell you how much I treasure your prayers.

on mechanical things

Within the last sixty minutes, Barry's computer went blue-screen with the message "System failure...Erasing physical memory..." and the dear man working on our car called to say, "It's the transmission...you need a new or rebuilt one."

If it hadn't been for the mechanically-bizarre months we have just weathered (3 computer crashes, 1 smashed screen, black holes in back-ups, two cars in the shop, strange sounds emanating from our dryer) I think I might be a tad sad. At this point, however, all you can do is smile.

The new hard drive will arrive this week and I'm sure we'll figure out what to do with the van in the next few days. But the really important stuff of life is intact, working, sound, and healthy: faith, family, service.

As a family today we went to vote (no lines in our small town), play in the park, and enjoy an ice cream treat. The kids have rolled in the crunchy leaves and played with the dogs. In a few minutes, I'll give them their baths and settle in to do Keona's hair. This is the precious stuff of life. This is the stuff smiles are made of.